“These are the hands of your best friend, young, strong and full of love for you, that are holding yours on your wedding day, as you promise to love each other to day, tomorrow, and forever. These are the hands that will work alongside yours, as together you build your future. These are the hands that will give you strength when you need it. and lastly, these are the hands that even when wrinkled and aged, will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch.”
I love weddings, so I was absolutely thrilled to be invited to Rebecca Dowd and Simon Sawell’s wedding at beautiful historical Tomago House in Port Stephens.
Fully expecting the traditional white wedding, the walk down the aisle to the accompaniment of “Here comes the bride” etc.etc. It came as a quite a surprise that this wedding was not in the least traditional. Far from it.
The ceremony originally was to be held outdoors, in the beautiful grounds of Tomago House, and as I arrived I was taken by surprise with some unusual items on display, next to the red carpet and the outdoor seating arrangements. Other guests like myself looked at them and wondered.
There was a rock placed on top of a white cloth, on top of a pedestal. A huge sword worthy of Sir Lancelot was leaning against a table, which held 3 candles. 2 small coloured side candles, and in the middle of these was a large white candle.
A bottle of wine, and a silver chalice also sat on the table. A wooden walking staff is also on display.
Whilst we waited for the bride to arrive (the groom was already there- looking anxious but proud) we were entertained by a trio woodland nymphs, (well they were three young sisters dressed in flowing white gowns, and had circlets of flowers around their heads. They played a mix of classical and medieval music on the cross-harp, flute and electric piano. Quite delightful.
The Celebrant, Philip Greentree, (whose company Greentree Ceremonies, is renowned not only for performing at conventional wedding ceremonies but also Hindu, Buddhist, Chinese, Scottish, and more,) is also waiting to perform his duty on this special occasion- Simon and Rebecca ‘s Celtic wedding.
Excitements mounts as the bride arrives, however along came the rain too, and the ceremony was moved indoors.
It made no difference. The atmosphere remained the same - mysterious and ethereal.
Philip donned his white Celtic robe, which had a pale blue cross on the back. Immediately he looked the part of the mystery of the Celts.
He welcomes everyone to the ceremony, and explained his right and authority to be able to perform the marriage.
Both Simon and his Best Man Byren (who is also his son) looked resplendent in long collarless black jackets, and trousers. White shirts and white buttonholes completed the picture. They awaited excitedly the arrival of the beautiful bride Rebecca.
She floats fairy-like down the red carpet on her father’s right arm. The harp and violins soar. It is a magical moment.
Standing before the celebrant they are asked
“Who here gives their blessing to this bride in marriage?
Rebecca’s father says, “I do”
He lets go Rebecca’s hand and she now stands alongside Simon, and Byren, with her bridesmaid Caroline just behind her holding the long train of her magnificent cream satin and chiffon gown. Hessie the fairytale flower girl (Rebecca’s daughter) carried a basket of flower petals, ready to be strewn on the ground.
The Celebrant then asks the groom:
“Simon John Sawell do you come before me of your own free will and accord?”
“I do” says Simon.
“Rebecca Anne Dowd do you come before me of your own free will and accord?”
“I do,” says Rebecca.
The Celebrant then asks the couples mothers to come forward. In turn they each light one side candle, leaving the large one in the centre unlit. This is a very special ritual that confirms the blessings of both parents on the marriage. The parents return to their seats and the ceremony proceeds:
The Celebrant began with “We have come together here in celebration of the joining together of Rebecca and Simon. There are many things to say about marriage. Much wisdom concerning the joining together of two souls, has come our way through all paths of belief and from many cultures. With each union, more knowledge is gained and more wisdom gathered.
Marriage is a bond to be entered into only after considerable thought and refection. As with any aspect of life it has its ups and downs, its trials and its triumphs. With full understanding of this Rebecca and Simon have come here today to be joined as one in marriage.”
He then asked for the wedding rings to be brought forward. (This is Byren’s task)
The celebrant then said, “I will now wash these rings in the waters of Port Stephens. In doing so I wash away all traces of worldly worries and fears to date, so that they go to their bearers fresh, with a new beginning.”
(He dips the rings in a special bowl of Port Stephens water). Dries them, then holds the rings up for all to see while saying the following: -
“May the gentle breeze bear witness to this ritual and carry it’s message to all lands. May the sun warm your hearts, and its ever- burning fire fuel your desire for each other. May the sea provide for you from its bounty and comfort your souls with her sounds. May the earth lend it’s strength and reveal it’s mysteries”
He handed Simon and Rebecca the rings. They exchange the rings in the traditional way, and exchange their vows. I cannot recollect all that they said to each other, but one sentence stood out – “I will never change you “ – After that I canny remember the rest of their vows being too overwhelmed at this time. I remember they sounded beautiful, and sincere. Truly would have brought a tear to a glass eye. (I’m Scottish too- old Glaswegian joke).
Now to the most profound and significant part of this unique wedding –
Handfasting – the act of spiritual marriage and the most famous of all Celtic traditions.
Philip the celebrant places Rebecca and Simon’s wrists over each other and loosely binds them with a red ribbon. Traditionally a white ribbon was used and the palms of the lovers cut as in a blood oath which would stain the ribbon red. There is also another meaning which states that by using the colour red – that there will be no jealousy between these too.
He then asks them kneel before the rock (remember the rock sitting on the white cloth on a pedestal?) placing their bound hands on top if it. This signifies that this marriage is now “set in stone”.
“These are the hands of your best friend, young, strong and full of love for you, that are holding yours on your wedding day, as you promise to love each other to day, tomorrow, and forever. These are the hands that will work alongside yours, as together you build your future. These are the hands that will give you strength when you need it. and lastly, these are the hands that even when wrinkled and aged, will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch.”
Phillip paused for the congregation to take in the solemnity of the ceremony – just long enough so that Hessie, the six year old flower girl was able to interject with “You’re stuck now mummy!”
After the laughter there was more, much more, but I cannot recollect all of it. Even though I want to - at least I now know where the phrase “To tie the knot comes from!
Then, out of the blue, Philip takes hold of the sword and waves it above Rebecca and Simon – Wow! This ritual, represents the fending off of all enemies that would dare cross their paths. It’s stirring stuff.
Phillip lowers the sword then pours a glass of wine into the silver chalice. He hands it to Simon and asks him to toast and confirm his vows with his beloved. They take turns sipping from the loving cup.
Philip says” Drink to your love in the present, on this your wedding day.”
And they do.
Declaration of the marriage:
Philip, now says to the happy couple “May your love so endure that its flame remains a guiding light unto you.”
Then Rebecca and Simon light the middle white candle. The flame of love.
Finally the signing – The bridal party retires to the signing table to complete the legals.
It’s over. This Celtic wedding ceremony has left me full of joy and hope for a beautiful future for Rebecca and Simon.
I know it will be so.
Of course the rest of the day was spent in eating, drinking, the cutting of the cake. The speeches that followed. Dancing, laughing and truly a wonderful time was had by all.
I’m so glad I was a guest at this unforgettable wedding.
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